Alright, let’s talk about this “fat people on a motorcycle” thing. It all started when I saw this picture online, right? Just some dudes, bigger than average, cruisin’ on a hog. And I thought, “Hey, I could probably do that.”
So, first thing I did was drag my own bike out of the garage. It’s an old beater, a Suzuki Savage 650. Not exactly a Harley, but it’s mine, and it runs… most of the time. Then I started thinking about weight distribution. See, I’m not exactly svelte myself. And I figured if I was gonna try to haul someone else around, I needed to get the balance right.
I hopped on, alone first, just to feel it out. Did a few loops around the block, checkin’ how the suspension handled. Felt kinda sluggish, to be honest. Next up was finding a willing participant. My buddy, let’s call him Big Tony, fit the bill perfectly. He’s a good sport and definitely… substantial.
We met up in the parking lot, and I gave Tony the rundown. “Lean with the bike, don’t make sudden movements, and for the love of god, hold on tight!” He gave me a nervous chuckle, climbed on behind me, and we were off. Or, at least, we tried to be. The initial acceleration was rough. The bike groaned like an old man getting out of bed. But once we got rolling, it wasn’t too bad.
We stuck to side streets, avoiding any major traffic. I could feel Tony shifting around behind me, trying to get comfortable. Every bump in the road sent a jolt through the whole rig. It was definitely a workout. After about 15 minutes, I pulled over. “Alright, Tony, how we feelin’?” He looked a little green around the gills. “I think I pulled a butt muscle,” he said. Classic Tony.
We swapped positions. I hopped on the back, and Tony took the reins. He’s actually a surprisingly good rider. Smooth, controlled, nothin’ jerky. We did another 15 minutes like that, then called it a day. We grabbed some burgers (naturally) and talked about the experience.
Honestly? It was harder than I expected. The bike felt underpowered, the suspension was struggling, and steering was definitely more challenging. But it was also kinda fun. There’s something about pushing the limits of what your equipment can do. Would I do it again? Probably not on that bike. But maybe, just maybe, with a bigger engine and some upgraded suspension… who knows?
The real lesson here? Don’t underestimate the importance of a good suspension system. And maybe lay off the burgers before trying to haul a friend around on a motorcycle. Just sayin’.
